Life is precious – don’t take it for granted!

It was 9/11 about a week ago and I am reminded how fragile and precious life is.  All those who lost their lives that day, headed out that morning to work, boarded a plane, went out for a walk or started their daily routine not knowing that it was their last. Their lives and the lives of their loved ones altered forever in just a fraction of a moment. Just like that.

I remember when the son of a very good friend of ours died in a boating accident. He was 13! I recall hearing the news stunned in disbelief. He was my son’s hockey team mate. He was out on their family boat on a long weekend in the summer when tragedy struck. I still remember the faces of the family members at the funeral and my son, along with five other team mates walking beside the casket. It hit home. Life is precious. Not a single moment should ever be taken for granted.

That experience taught me a lot.

·        Don’t save things for special occasions

·        If you have something nice to say to someone, say it. Don’t hold back

·        Pursue your dreams – write them down, set goals and keep chipping away at them

·        Every morning is a gift – treat it as such

·        Your family is the most important thing in this world. Never ever take them for granted

·        Appreciate the simple treasures in life

·        Don’t put off things you can accomplish today

·        Cultivate a grateful mindset

·        Never sweat the small stuff – “Let it go” ~ Frozen

·        Appreciate all the beauty around you

·        Live in the moment. Appreciate it. Treasure it. Soak it in

·        LIVE

·        Life is short – buy the shoes, take the trip, eat the cake

·        Know that you CAN make a difference, even in the smallest of ways you can

·        There is no such thing as a perfect time

I could keep going on. We get so caught up with life and the littlest of things at times that we forget to treasure the moment, enjoy the present and really and truly be grateful for the gift we have called life. So, live it. Treasure it. Take it in. Be ever so grateful for the gift of it.    

YOU are the Lead Actor in your movie

Never be the supporting actress or actor in your own movie. You play the lead role so play it. Stop playing second fiddle and back up! Often, we become extras in our own movie, playing alongside others who have taken over the lead roles. Enough already. It’s time to step up and move over to the role you were meant to play. It’s time to take the lead so….

·        Lead – It’s what you are meant to do. It’s your movie. It’s your life, so lead it. Whether it’s becoming a trail blazer or meandering through the world and enjoying your journey through life, it’s up to you to decide. Whatever that decision is, live your best life. Do good. Do your best. Live to the fullest.

·        Commit – Any good actor knows to make it a blockbuster, you’ve got to commit to the role. Give it your everything and make it count. You can’t play a half-hearted character, you must be all in.

·        There will be do-overs – “Cut” the director yells. You get to run the scene again. I do realize sometimes you don’t have the luxury of a do-over. There are tragedies. In those instances, you take the time to heal and you move on to your next scene as hard as it maybe. Most times though, you do get a second chance. Sometimes however, it will take more than a second chance. Do it over and over until you get it right. It’s YOUR movie. It’s YOUR life.

·        Practice – Contrary to popular belief, it does not make perfect, but it will get you closer to it. Practice, over and over again. The more you practice, the better you get.

·        Change – As often as you want, as often as you need, change your story, change your scene. You are not only the lead actor but also the editor, director and producer all wrapped into one. At times though, change will happen without your direction. That’s just life keeping you in your toes. Re-adjust. Assess where you go next. It’s your movie, make it your own.

Too often we take a back seat in our own life. Letting others direct it the way they want. I just wanted to remind you that YOU are in fact the lead actor in your movie, in your life, so take centre stage. Lead…. “And action”….

Rome wasn’t built in a day

We are painting, doing some small renos and trying to de-clutter all at the same time. The house looks a disaster and will probably look even worse when the real work begins when we replace the flooring downstairs. There are buckets of paint, plastic paper, paint brushes and garbage bags throughout the house. The bedroom no longer a sanctuary and our bathroom doesn’t have a mirror! Yes…. it’s annoying and a tad inconvenient to say the least.

I remind myself daily that transformation takes time. The results will be amazing in the end. I keep repeating the mantra in my head, so I don’t get too frustrated with the chaos we’re in right now. It’s not easy going through it. It feels endless and so chaotic that sometimes it does not make sense. I keep the end vision in mind to get through it along with some other helpful hints.

·       It will get hectic, chaotic and messy. There’s no way out of this, to truly transform. Knowing this helps get through the sticky spots. You know it will be messy. You can expect it. It’s a sure thing so be prepared to hang in there through the ugliness.

·       Don’t expect it to change over night. Transformation takes time and sometimes LOTS of time. Be patient. Keep the faith.

·       There will be small victories through the journey. Enjoy them. We couldn’t see the floor or the back wall of a closet. When we de-cluttered it, the whole space looked entirely different. Spacious, new and inviting. The rest of the space the closet is in, still has a long way to go but the closet is something else 😊 small victories. Relish them.

·       Organize the chaos. It doesn’t have to be one big hot mess. Each room, each task can have it’s assigned plan and chaos. Phase it all out. We chose to move through the house in stages but we weren’t sticklers about moving to the next task until the previous one was complete. We did what made sense. As paint was drying in one room, we de-cluttered the next. Be flexible about the plan and adjust as you go along.

·       Take a breather. Trying to push through and plug away without a break will only burn you out. We had injuries trying to push through. So we take a load off. Sometimes slowing down, does help you move faster and longer. Remember the turtle and the hare story? 

Transformation is not easy and certainly not for the faint of heart. If you truly want a change for the better, personally and professionally, transformation is always needed a few times in your life and career. Just know that “Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous in the end” ~ Robin Sharma

You won't be everyone's cup of tea…

Not everyone will think you are awesome,….. and that’s perfectly OK!! Hard to accept but no matter how awesome you think you are or have heard it one thousand times over, there may be a few or just that one and only person that will disagree. Accept it and move on. It really is ok, and life will turn out alright. Really.

It's ok to have a “few” flaws and not be everyone’s cup of tea or coffee for that matter. Embrace it. It’s probably them and not you!! In any event, rather than obsessing about it, trying to be a people pleaser, converter or worse downright ignoring it, reflect, accept and move on.

• Stay true to your values – ALWAYS. Don’t ever change them, tweak them or set them aside to fit into someone else’s mold or awesomeness definition. Do you. The right people will appreciate it, accept it and love you for it. Those are the ones you want in your corner. Let the others go. Your values are important and something to treasure. They make you who you are and is your passport in this world. Don’t change them…. unless they are out of whack. If not, protect them with all your might.

• Be yourself. Be proud of who you are. You are unique. There is no one else like you. Be confident. Don’t be a people pleaser! You can’t stand out if you are always trying to fit in (thanks Dr. Seuss!). It’s ok to be different. It’s ok that some do not accept you for who you are. Love yourself for all your goodness, kindness, quirkiness, mistakes and substance. That is all you. If you don’t already, then take time to love it. Love YOU. If you need further proof, see… http://tehanimott.blogspot.com/2013/04/be-yourself.html

• Other people’s opinions are just that…. other people’s. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion of you get you down. They are entitled to their opinion and you don’t have to accept it. Move on! Don’t allow the opinions of others affect you negatively. It’s quite alright to reflect on it but don’t do it for too long. We are all a work-in-progress so it’s important to reflect on room for improvements on ourselves. It doesn’t mean beating yourself up though. You need the right amount of space and time to reflect and truly move on. Pay attention to where it’s coming from as well. Some opinions maybe important but some belong in the trash.

It’s human nature to look for affection and validation in our day to day lives and relationships. We must come to terms though, that we will not get the love and affection ALL THE TIME, regardless of how awesome and amazing we are. You will not be everyone’s cup of tea and that may be a good thing.

Yep, I have a horn of plenty!

Cornucopia; commonly seen around Thanksgiving time, is a symbol of abundance, plenty, fruit, nourishment and colour. It was around the Canadian tables, mid-October, and will show off its’ autumn hues again on the American tables, end of November. Coming from an Asian country I knew nothing of its’ symbolism and existence until I settled in Canada. It is a great reminder of things to be thankful for, the one day of the year. If only it permanently stays the full 365 days of the year and 366 days every leap year!! Would it then help us remember the abundance in our lives? The things we take for granted daily? The little things we should be thankful for that others may not have the privilege to experience or have?

Alli Polin reminded me of this with her blog on “Ditch the Stress; Choose Gratitude” If you haven’t read it yet I highly recommend you do. I did, which inspired this post on being thankful and here is my list of things I am VERY thankful for;

1. My Husband, Son and Daughter…yes that’s three but they are all #1 on my list and the reason for ALL I do and am.
2. My Dad, Mom, Sister and Brother (I hate the word brother in law) in Texas, who know, that even though I don’t say it often, I love them with all my heart.
3. Wonderful, crazy, fun and awesome friends. They keep me young and happy.
4. My God. My faith!
5. I am thankful for the roof over my head. I see people on my daily commute who live under a bridge in Toronto. They are people just like you and me, but some circumstance in life got them there. Don’t judge!!
6. My country. Yes, even in winter I love it!
7. My job, which I don’t consider a job. It’s my opportunity to serve.
8. Good health.
9. My church community.
10. Social media and the amazing people I connect through it. They inspire me daily on my commute to work and back home. Also, without it, I wouldn’t be writing this post.
11. My online communities; #LeadWithGiants, #LeadFromWithin and #HRockstars. They keep me learning and motivated.
12. The honourable men and women that serve to protect us and our freedoms.
13. Shoes and handbags…. thank you sister for making me appreciate them!
14. Hockey games, specially my son’s! It keeps my vocal cords strong.
15. My daughter’s Cheerleading. It keeps us traveling often.
16. The Canadian Mental Health Association, Peel and the Board members I serve with. They have given me an opportunity to do something good.
17. Music…. all kinds of music.
18. Good food.
19. A seat on the GO train. It’s a precious thing in the morning.
20. The great times I have with my family.
21. Board games which happens to also contribute to #18.
22. Good movies. Gladiator is #1 on my list of faves.
23. Joe, the paper man near the subway, who always smiles and says good morning to everyone bustling by. I wish more people would smile back at the very least!
24. My life, just the way it is!
25. Swimming. It has taught me a TON. I now miss those grueling days dearly.
26. Family vacations.
27. Lilly at Tim Horton’s. She always serves me my coffee with a GIANT smile.
28. Tim Horton’s coffee. It’s certainly not the best but gives me comfort.
29. I am thankful for YOU, for reading this.
30. My family as a whole. They’ve shaped me and continue to do so everyday!

Thanks again for reading! I hope it has inspired you and was worth your time. Do jot down your list of things you are thankful for. I did! Thanks, Alli Polin for that inspiration!