When everyday feels like Groundhog Day

It’s been just over a year now with shutdowns, lock-downs, stay at home orders, grey zones and red zones, and just like most of you, I can’t keep up. Regardless of what colour or lock-down type it is, we’ve pretty much been indoors. Going out for a few drives, dropping off groceries for my daughter who lives an hour away from us and only going out when we must for groceries, and even that, hubby has that covered so I remain mostly indoors. It feels like Groundhog Day every day. One day blending into another into one very long and tiring year. To find some light to things and stay motivated, I’ve been trying to find something new, something to look forward to everyday. It’s hard at times when everyday feels just like the day before but I really do try. It gets me up and looking forward to the day and maybe the event I’m anticipating, however small that maybe.

I’ve listed some of my favourites and yes, they are somewhat in raking order.

·       Leafs games!!

·       Raptor’s games and the Jays – although I still can’t sit through an entire baseball game on tv yet.

·       Long drives by the Lakeshore or anywhere near water.

·       A long walk in nature.

·       New yoga classes.

·       Online seminars and learnings – these have been great to keep up with what others are doing to adapt to this new norm and stretch my learnings.

·       A virtual coffee chats.

·       House party with friends – no not an actual party but an app that’s a bunch of games you play virtually with friends.

·       A good book – this has been something really exciting to look forward to, and I don’t give the ones that don’t resonate with me anymore of my time. I was someone that pushed through to continue reading but not anymore. There are way too many good ones to get to.

·       Duolingo – another app – I’m learning Spanish. I’ve been keeping this up every day. I will be well prepared the next time I travel whenever that is.

·       Planning the next trip. Researching, looking up new destinations, flipping through You Tube videos has me looking forward to the next trip. Definitely not the same as going but planning, plotting and researching is lots of fun. I have three booked and am waiting for the green light to fly.

·       A meal from a local restaurant.

·       A new project.

·       Shutterfly – I spent an entire weekend converting all those old vacation pics into photo books. It was an absolute joy to get the books and go through them.

·       Netflix series – there’s some great ones. It’s nice to look forward to a new episode each day.

·       Explore new ideas and opportunities. Plan them out. Make it happen.

·       Change up a room. We spruced up the principle bedroom with curtains and what a transformation it was.

·       I’m fortunate to be working on a big construction project. There is never a dull moment at work and seems something new happens everyday that never fails to surprise me.

·       Selfcare. So essential, so carve out the time!

·       Declutter – organize! 

·       I hate cooking – but a few times I did make it a point to plan and cook a meal – Moussaka one day and nachos another. It was something to look forward to and everyone enjoyed it. I am yet to plan the next but again…something to look forward to.

These are just a few of my favourites and I am always looking for more ideas. When everyday feels like Groundhog Day, challenge yourself to find something new. Dig deep. What’s new? Tweet me some of your ideas I can try out.

One thing off of the Bucket List

I finally signed up for Yoga Teacher Training. After five and something years of wanting to do it, I finally did! I wrote up the application, toured the studio, paid my registration fees and took my 1^st class in a nine-month training course, this past weekend. It was that simple. I had a million and one excuses before…. it was never the right time, there was always too much going on, kids were involved in this that and the other, then it was the kids’ university which is costly, there were the vacations that got in the way, the studios the classes were conducted at seemed hard to get to. Again, excuses and none of them substantial. If I really wanted to do it, I could have but just didn’t get around to doing it. Plain and simple. The “will” was not stronger than all those excuses combined. Finally, though, it was. I signed up, because this time, I REALLY wanted to do it. My intent and will were strong enough to finally commit to getting it done.

The 1^st weekend of the training course is now under my belt. I have nine more weekends and eight more Thursday nights to complete. The 1^st weekend was both exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. My classmates are wonderful, and our teachers are fabulous. The energy around the room, exhausted as we all were, was still very uplifting. Everyone had their own story and reasons for embarking on this journey and they were just as diverse as the group of us. It’s a lot to complete. It’s not going to be easy.  We must all fit in assignment time, regular yoga practice time, study time and training time along with work, family and just regular day to day stuff. Personal goals are never easy to achieve but the harder you work at it and achieve it, the sweeter the reward. Once completed, there will be one less item on my bucket list. I can’t wait.

How many times do we postpone things we really want to do? I am not talking about a loose wish list but something that has substance and real desire to complete like a long-standing bucket list item or a goal in life. This was one of them for me. A million of excuses and challenges certainly will come up. It’s up to us to move past them all. There is no such thing as the right time…. there will always be a bill that needs to be paid, there will always be regular day to day commitments, fitting it in to our already packed days and weeks and months will always be an issue but, nothing that cannot be addressed and overcome. There are ways. Lots of ways to “just do it” (thanks Nike). So, what’s stopping you? Start your list and figure out ways to overcome all those dreaded excuses.

I will leave you with this “Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Namaste!

Put down that phone.

It’s the age of the smart phone where you see everyone engrossed in their hand-held devices. If you just sit back and observe people around you, wherever you are, you will notice how almost everyone is buried on their phones. Yes, including me. There’d be people beside you, family, friends and strangers waiting for something, in the middle of a conversation, having dinner, watching TV, and all focus is on the phone. I saw a brilliant cartoon the other day on Facebook where people around were portrayed as shadows and the people beside them portrayed brightly and vividly on their phone, oblivious to the real world situations and people around them thanks to that wondrous invention – the smart phone. One time, we were at the airport and witnessed a family of four – mom, dad, two young children about five or 7 years old and all four of them on their devices sitting and waiting in the lounge. “How sad” I thought to myself and was also so thankful I didn’t have to raise my two kids (now adults 21 and 19) with the distraction of the smart phone or iPad. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not ALL bad. There is a purpose and wonderful world within that smart phone no doubt, however, as with anything in life, moderation is key.

There is an increased link to mental health issues, social anxiety and an addiction to social media due to the introduction of the smart phone. That’s another post for another time.

I feel I am constantly reminding my family of the need to put down that phone. At dinner and meal times together, it is an absolute NO, and everyone adheres to it! Overall though, it’s a hard sell. The smart phone gives you that distraction, engagement, entertainment and mindless leisure all at your finger tips….so I am starting the change with me.

·       I give myself periods during the day where I use it and then have time to be completely unplugged.

·       The phone was my train ride buddy – but now, I use it only half way through and switch to a great read for the other half of the ride. I’ve been reading more lately which I quite enjoy. I am currently reading Michelle Obama’s “Becoming” – a great read!

·       The mindless game of Candy Crush has stopped while having a conversation on speaker phone or my headset.

·       It’s been a treat to engage with people and being present fully without having to twiddle my thumbs on the device.

·       When I am watching TV or a movie – I do just that or at least I try my best to. This is still, a work in progress. For the most part it’s, no more picking up the phone and idling through social media during the boring parts or commercials.

·       It’s an absolute NO while enjoying company and hanging out with friends and family.

The phone still is a valuable tool when you want to look things up further to what you are watching or discussing, so that’s not going to stop. It’s a joy though, to enjoy life and people with no distractions. To be fully present. To enjoy and experience the moment just as it is. It’s hard for those, like me, who are accustomed now to the ease of information and entertainment right at your finger tips. It’s a process to unlearn something you just picked up and oh so well too. It’s work-in-progress to me. Now, I will be picking it up to post and promote this blog post and catch up on others, but right after, I am putting that darn phone down.

Drown out the white noise!

Ever had that nagging noise in the back of your head like a humdrum of a fan in the background? It usually comes on when a brilliant idea pops up or you want to go after something you’ve always wanted. Your passion, your dreams or goals perhaps. It’s an annoying buzz of negativity, what ifs and I don’t think it’s doable running low, slow and steady in the back of your mind. Drown it out! Yes, yes, it’s hard. Easier said than done I know, but, keep at it and it becomes easier and easier every time you do. Keep building that muscle of pushing out the noise. Soon it will become a habit and an instinct that helps you keep moving ahead with your ideas, goals and plans. Learn how to quieten the white noise when you have things to accomplish. Here’s how;

·        Take a break – Seems counter-intuitive but it really DOES work. Go for a walk. Take in nature. Just sit and still your mind with a cup of tea or coffee. Read a book. Do something to change the scenery. Don’t think about what needs to be done, just enjoy the moment, stay calm and try to quiet the mind by not thinking about what needs to be done, your idea, goal or plan. Just enjoy the moment just as it is. It may take a few hours, it may take a couple of days but tale the time needed to give yourself and your mind a break. Then get back at it.

·        Plan it out – “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail” ~ Benjamin Franklin. Plan out your idea or goal. Jot down the high-level steps, your details in-between, create a task list. It’s a great way to drown out the noise. Keep working towards your goal by pouring your mind and planning towards it. You won’t hear much of the noise planning out your big dream. Remember a dream is just a dream until it’s planned out and followed through by action to make it a reality.

·        Give in to it – Yes – it’s completely opposite of bullet #1, but, that white noise may be something you need to pay close attention to. Write down ALL the what ifs, the negatives, the issues and challenges. Think about ways to mitigate them. Write it out. Every time they come out, work out a strategy to overcome them. If you can’t come up with a strategy to overcome them, then action bullet #1 😊 it’s amazing what you can accomplish by just giving yourself a quick break.

·        Get help – Have a close circle of friends, family and encouragers. Seek out the most supportive in the lot and talk it out. Having a friendly ear always helps dispel any doubts. They can also help discern the real issues versus just random worries. Beware of the negative Nellies. See more here http://tehanimott.blogspot.com/2013/05/dont-get-sucked-in.html They do have a purpose, but you are looking to move forward, so seek out the positive and encouraging allies you need during this time.  

Most often we don’t realize our purpose, dreams and goals, not because we can’t, but because we give into that white noise in the background. While there’s always value of listening in, there is more value in pushing through all that hum drum noise and realizing whatever it is you want to realize. So, shush that noise already and push through. Your passion project awaits.

You won't be everyone's cup of tea…

Not everyone will think you are awesome,….. and that’s perfectly OK!! Hard to accept but no matter how awesome you think you are or have heard it one thousand times over, there may be a few or just that one and only person that will disagree. Accept it and move on. It really is ok, and life will turn out alright. Really.

It's ok to have a “few” flaws and not be everyone’s cup of tea or coffee for that matter. Embrace it. It’s probably them and not you!! In any event, rather than obsessing about it, trying to be a people pleaser, converter or worse downright ignoring it, reflect, accept and move on.

• Stay true to your values – ALWAYS. Don’t ever change them, tweak them or set them aside to fit into someone else’s mold or awesomeness definition. Do you. The right people will appreciate it, accept it and love you for it. Those are the ones you want in your corner. Let the others go. Your values are important and something to treasure. They make you who you are and is your passport in this world. Don’t change them…. unless they are out of whack. If not, protect them with all your might.

• Be yourself. Be proud of who you are. You are unique. There is no one else like you. Be confident. Don’t be a people pleaser! You can’t stand out if you are always trying to fit in (thanks Dr. Seuss!). It’s ok to be different. It’s ok that some do not accept you for who you are. Love yourself for all your goodness, kindness, quirkiness, mistakes and substance. That is all you. If you don’t already, then take time to love it. Love YOU. If you need further proof, see… http://tehanimott.blogspot.com/2013/04/be-yourself.html

• Other people’s opinions are just that…. other people’s. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion of you get you down. They are entitled to their opinion and you don’t have to accept it. Move on! Don’t allow the opinions of others affect you negatively. It’s quite alright to reflect on it but don’t do it for too long. We are all a work-in-progress so it’s important to reflect on room for improvements on ourselves. It doesn’t mean beating yourself up though. You need the right amount of space and time to reflect and truly move on. Pay attention to where it’s coming from as well. Some opinions maybe important but some belong in the trash.

It’s human nature to look for affection and validation in our day to day lives and relationships. We must come to terms though, that we will not get the love and affection ALL THE TIME, regardless of how awesome and amazing we are. You will not be everyone’s cup of tea and that may be a good thing.