One thing off of the Bucket List

I finally signed up for Yoga Teacher Training. After five and something years of wanting to do it, I finally did! I wrote up the application, toured the studio, paid my registration fees and took my 1^st class in a nine-month training course, this past weekend. It was that simple. I had a million and one excuses before…. it was never the right time, there was always too much going on, kids were involved in this that and the other, then it was the kids’ university which is costly, there were the vacations that got in the way, the studios the classes were conducted at seemed hard to get to. Again, excuses and none of them substantial. If I really wanted to do it, I could have but just didn’t get around to doing it. Plain and simple. The “will” was not stronger than all those excuses combined. Finally, though, it was. I signed up, because this time, I REALLY wanted to do it. My intent and will were strong enough to finally commit to getting it done.

The 1^st weekend of the training course is now under my belt. I have nine more weekends and eight more Thursday nights to complete. The 1^st weekend was both exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. My classmates are wonderful, and our teachers are fabulous. The energy around the room, exhausted as we all were, was still very uplifting. Everyone had their own story and reasons for embarking on this journey and they were just as diverse as the group of us. It’s a lot to complete. It’s not going to be easy.  We must all fit in assignment time, regular yoga practice time, study time and training time along with work, family and just regular day to day stuff. Personal goals are never easy to achieve but the harder you work at it and achieve it, the sweeter the reward. Once completed, there will be one less item on my bucket list. I can’t wait.

How many times do we postpone things we really want to do? I am not talking about a loose wish list but something that has substance and real desire to complete like a long-standing bucket list item or a goal in life. This was one of them for me. A million of excuses and challenges certainly will come up. It’s up to us to move past them all. There is no such thing as the right time…. there will always be a bill that needs to be paid, there will always be regular day to day commitments, fitting it in to our already packed days and weeks and months will always be an issue but, nothing that cannot be addressed and overcome. There are ways. Lots of ways to “just do it” (thanks Nike). So, what’s stopping you? Start your list and figure out ways to overcome all those dreaded excuses.

I will leave you with this “Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Namaste!

Life is precious – don’t take it for granted!

It was 9/11 about a week ago and I am reminded how fragile and precious life is.  All those who lost their lives that day, headed out that morning to work, boarded a plane, went out for a walk or started their daily routine not knowing that it was their last. Their lives and the lives of their loved ones altered forever in just a fraction of a moment. Just like that.

I remember when the son of a very good friend of ours died in a boating accident. He was 13! I recall hearing the news stunned in disbelief. He was my son’s hockey team mate. He was out on their family boat on a long weekend in the summer when tragedy struck. I still remember the faces of the family members at the funeral and my son, along with five other team mates walking beside the casket. It hit home. Life is precious. Not a single moment should ever be taken for granted.

That experience taught me a lot.

·        Don’t save things for special occasions

·        If you have something nice to say to someone, say it. Don’t hold back

·        Pursue your dreams – write them down, set goals and keep chipping away at them

·        Every morning is a gift – treat it as such

·        Your family is the most important thing in this world. Never ever take them for granted

·        Appreciate the simple treasures in life

·        Don’t put off things you can accomplish today

·        Cultivate a grateful mindset

·        Never sweat the small stuff – “Let it go” ~ Frozen

·        Appreciate all the beauty around you

·        Live in the moment. Appreciate it. Treasure it. Soak it in

·        LIVE

·        Life is short – buy the shoes, take the trip, eat the cake

·        Know that you CAN make a difference, even in the smallest of ways you can

·        There is no such thing as a perfect time

I could keep going on. We get so caught up with life and the littlest of things at times that we forget to treasure the moment, enjoy the present and really and truly be grateful for the gift we have called life. So, live it. Treasure it. Take it in. Be ever so grateful for the gift of it.    

Savor the little things

It’s summer time. I want to make the most of it. So, when hubby says, “ice cream?” at 11pm, I say “absolutely”. We get to the ice cream store and the lineup is all the way up to the main road. It’s like everyone thought of ice cream at 11pm at night. There are families, young kids, older couples, the place is buzzing. Everyone just out trying to soak up every bit of summer. A small enjoyment like a cone of ice cream was what everyone wanted. Too often we get caught up with the “big” things that we completely miss the little joys in life. These little joys most times become the big things in life. So, savor the moment and soak up every ounce of joy and happiness from all those little moments. Here are some of mine starting with of course;

·       Ice Cream at 11pm on a hot summer night

·       Snap chat conversations with your kids – they are funny and entertaining

·       Coffee early morning on the deck and seeing the busyness of the birds

·       Game nights with the family – it gets heated!

·       The commute in the morning and passing through the Credit River – it’s an even bigger treat seeing the Oarsmen rowing on the water

·       Those Pjs and Pancake days

·       A glass of wine with the hubby in the backyard and the loud drone of Cicadas

·       An impromptu visit from a friend

·       Sunday night dinner with all the family present – a rare treat now when your kids become young adults

·       Long drives - anywhere

·       A dip in the lake on a hot summer day

·       Table topic conversations with the family – you learn so much

·       Antique shopping – I try my best not to get carried away

·       Hot tub time, especially in the Winter

·       Any vacation – big or small. Some of the best ones we’ve had were weekend gateways at Niagara-on-the-Lake

·       Ball games in the summer

·       BBQs and get-togethers with family and friends

·       Happy hours and patios

·       Easy conversations with the kids

The littlest things take up the biggest part of our lives. So, treasure them. Never ever take them for granted. Take them all in…. slowly, appreciating the little treasures in life.  

Say it loud…… THE RAPTORS ARE THE 2019 NBA CHAMPS!

The Raptors are the 2019 NBA Champs!!! I like saying that. I will always remember where I was, who I was with and that glorious feeling of the “Sixers” (the 416ixers) winning in six. Two million people showed up for the parade to celebrate their historic win. This post is not about how great or historic that win was. We all know it was and then some more. It’s not about all the nail biting games they clinched leading up to it. It’s about how one man had a vision and moved his team towards executing that vision ever so well. It’s about leadership. The one big reason, in my humble opinion, why the Raptors won the Larry O’Brien trophy.

Most people did not understand or agree with the firing of former Raptor’s head coach Dwayne Casey, who had just been awarded Coach of the Year. Most people did not understand and hated the trade of fan favourite and star player DeMar DeRozen for Kawhi Leonard and Danny Green. It did not make sense to most, but to President of Raptor’s, Masai Ujiri, it made perfect sense. He was the leader that made the 2019 NBA championship possible. He executed pure and simple leadership.

·       Vision – He had a vision for the team and executed it with precision. He communicated that vision over and over, never giving up on it even when the team couldn’t see it. When the reality of it seemed like it was slipping away he still communicated that vision. He bought into the vision and kept selling us that vision at every opportunity he got. Yes, we all bought into it.

·       Seizing Opportunity – It was risky signing Kawhi Leonard coming off an injury, yet he seized it. A risky move, that later would pay off with an NBA championship and making Leonard one of the most valuable players in the sport.

·       Get the right people on the bus and get the wrong people off the bus – It’s a Jim Collin’s quote from his book “Good to Great”. If you haven’t read it, read it! It’s a great one. I’m sure it wasn’t easy letting Casey and Derozen go. To execute his vision and have it fulfilled however, it was needed. He needed to change up the dynamics of the team, change the leadership within it, so he could move it forward. He let them go, moved up Nick Nurse to head coach and brought in key players to fulfill his vision. After winning the championship he did give credit to both Casey and Derozen who were instrumental in the road towards the championship. Classy leadership!

·       Passion – He never lacked passion, in his pursuit of his vision, in the communication of his vision and the way he led. At times, he got into hot water trying to rally the team a little “too passionately” before crucial games.

·       Trust - He trusted his team, even when it seemed to not go as well. He was steadfast in his belief and trust in their capabilities and what they can achieve together.

If you follow basketball or the Raptors you would know that Kawhi Leonard, did not end up signing another season with Toronto. No hard feelings. We thank him for a stellar year and giving the city and the country something, we’ve never had before, an NBA championship. We wish him the best but not too much. We want to see the Raptors win again sometime soon. I trust Ujiri may have something up his sleeve …. I think it’s leadership.  

Do what you do with passion

I had posted my usual motivational tweet one morning… “Do what you do with passion or not at all”, to which someone sarcastically tweeted back, “I’m cleaning today, should I do that with passion too?” I said, “Absolutely yes”. Sure, it’s not, the most exciting of tasks, but still… why not? I would think you would want a clean looking house. How would you achieve the best possible result if you were grudgingly doing the work? I know I can’t. It’s easy when you are excited about the project or task to get passionate about the work. Not quite the same when it’s a mundane or day to day chore. So how do you get that excitement going?

·       Boost it up – ask yourself if it’s necessary – if not, then don’t do it. If it’s necessary, then get it done. Boost it up to liven the time doing it. I use music to boost up any tired old chore. Cleaning is a perfect example. With good music, I do feel passionately doing the most mundane of tasks. A little bit of wine helps too and sometimes more than just a little.

·       What’s next?  - it helps to think what’s coming up next. At times it’s something more exciting within a project or goal. Get the boring stuff out of the way to make room for the more exciting stuff. Doing with well and efficiently, will only lead to a better experience after it.

·       Two hands are always better than one – I like to include my family and friends in some of the not-so-exciting things I need to do. When we got our basement ready, when we needed to do some major cleaning and purging, I made sure I sourced out help. Didn’t want to keep all the “fun” to myself. It became an event, an exciting one and not so daunting and boring after all.

·       Envision the end – it’s nice to have a vision, with everything. It doesn’t have to be formal or written down but, planning it out in your head and envisioning the result and what it would look like can be good motivation on getting things done and getting them done well.

I must leave to complete another mundane task. Yes, it’s absolutely needed, and I am envisioning the final product to get me going. The end-result involves a very exciting NBA Finals game 5 against the Raptors and Golden State Warriors. Here I go with passion……

Rome wasn’t built in a day

We are painting, doing some small renos and trying to de-clutter all at the same time. The house looks a disaster and will probably look even worse when the real work begins when we replace the flooring downstairs. There are buckets of paint, plastic paper, paint brushes and garbage bags throughout the house. The bedroom no longer a sanctuary and our bathroom doesn’t have a mirror! Yes…. it’s annoying and a tad inconvenient to say the least.

I remind myself daily that transformation takes time. The results will be amazing in the end. I keep repeating the mantra in my head, so I don’t get too frustrated with the chaos we’re in right now. It’s not easy going through it. It feels endless and so chaotic that sometimes it does not make sense. I keep the end vision in mind to get through it along with some other helpful hints.

·       It will get hectic, chaotic and messy. There’s no way out of this, to truly transform. Knowing this helps get through the sticky spots. You know it will be messy. You can expect it. It’s a sure thing so be prepared to hang in there through the ugliness.

·       Don’t expect it to change over night. Transformation takes time and sometimes LOTS of time. Be patient. Keep the faith.

·       There will be small victories through the journey. Enjoy them. We couldn’t see the floor or the back wall of a closet. When we de-cluttered it, the whole space looked entirely different. Spacious, new and inviting. The rest of the space the closet is in, still has a long way to go but the closet is something else 😊 small victories. Relish them.

·       Organize the chaos. It doesn’t have to be one big hot mess. Each room, each task can have it’s assigned plan and chaos. Phase it all out. We chose to move through the house in stages but we weren’t sticklers about moving to the next task until the previous one was complete. We did what made sense. As paint was drying in one room, we de-cluttered the next. Be flexible about the plan and adjust as you go along.

·       Take a breather. Trying to push through and plug away without a break will only burn you out. We had injuries trying to push through. So we take a load off. Sometimes slowing down, does help you move faster and longer. Remember the turtle and the hare story? 

Transformation is not easy and certainly not for the faint of heart. If you truly want a change for the better, personally and professionally, transformation is always needed a few times in your life and career. Just know that “Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous in the end” ~ Robin Sharma

Persistence

Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success – Napoleon Hill

Persistence is defined by the firm or obstinate continuance in a course of action despite difficulty or opposition. It’s undeniably the one factor that overcomes defeat, pushes people to succeed and conquers those so-called unattainable goals. The ability to keep pushing past barriers, struggles, challenges and overcoming the impossible at times, to accomplish what you want, is a worthy and admirable skill. It’s the single trait that allows people to keep moving forward and not take life’s hard blows lying down. I love reflecting on the examples we know well and some not as much. It’s something to strive towards and remind yourself to keep driving forward and getting up every time we fall and fail.  Here’s some fine example of persistence….in no particular order.

1.    Tiger Woods - History was made the other day with Tiger Woods winning the 2019 Masters tournament. He battled a dreadful unhinging of his personal life, a diminishing golf career and physical injuries to come back on top. After his steady demise he battled back to win his first major in eleven years becoming the 2019 Masters champion.

2.       Diana Nyad – At age 64 and on her 5^th attempt Diane Nyad, conquered the swim from Havana, Cuba to Florida. There were some critics and controversies surrounding her unassisted swim following her accomplishment. Still, you can’t ignore the fact that perseverance drove her to complete the swim on her fifth attempt at age 64! Thirty-five years after her first attempt at this feat at age 29 in 1978, it’s nothing but impressive. 

3.       Michael Jordon – “I have failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.” It wasn’t everything but net for Michael Jordon who failed to make his high school basketball team. Not making the team was devastating but it pushed him to keep working harder and to keep persevering. It’s common knowledge how impressive of a career he had in basketball and by far one of the greatest athletes of our time.

4.       Nelson Mandela – After 27 years in prison, Mandela, did not give up hope or the desire to dismantle apartheid in South Africa. Soon after his release in 1990, he led the efforts to end apartheid. His long and gruelling stint in prison did not deter him from achieving his goal and desire for his nation. He was also befittingly called Madiba, Father of the Nation.

5.       Oprah Winfrey – Born into poverty and surviving a horrific childhood, Oprah persisted and slowly became a pinnacle of success and a magnate in the media. Her never say die attitude and positive thinking still resonates and changes peoples lives daily. Persistence is powerful.

6.       Joanne K Rowling – The author of the Harry Potter series, J K Rowling, was a single mom, who lived on welfare but never gave up her writing. She persisted through hardships, a divorce and depression, writing and mapping out her Harry Potter series wherever and whenever she could. The Harry Potter script was rejected by twelve major publishing houses and a couple years later was picked up by a small publisher who gave Rowling a small advance for the book and published only 1000 copies. The rest as you know is history.

7.       Sylvester Stallone – Trying hard to make a living, Stallone wrote the script for Rocky and wanted to star as the main character. He was rejected and was later offered $350,000 for the rights to the script, with someone else as the lead. He didn’t give in and settled for a much lower price for the script but with him as the star. The famous Rocky would not be the same without the persistence of Stallone.

8.       Alex Honnold – If you haven’t watched Free Solo yet, please do. It highlights the sheer grit, courage and persistence of Alex Honnold. He is the first and only person to free solo El Capitan in Yosemite National Park. His methodical and thoughtful planning along with his persistence of seeing it through despite all the risks involved, helped create one of the greatest athletic feats of our time.

9.       Walt Disney – He failed over and over before he succeeded. Several of his business went bankrupt before, Walt Disney became a mogul in the animation world. He believed in his art form and kept pushing through his failures and challenges. His loving creation Mickey Mouse still entertains and spreads happiness across the world today.

10.   Mahatma Gandhi – Lawyer who then become a political and social activist led the charge of gaining freedom in India. Exposed to racial discrimination in South Africa, Gandhi gradually became a social activist fighting for racial equality and rights in South Africa. Returning to his home country, India, Gandhi became synonymous with freedom and civil rights. His persistent, non-violent, non-cooperation movement helped the eventual independence of India.

Have I left off any other examples of persistence? If so, please do share!

Put down that phone.

It’s the age of the smart phone where you see everyone engrossed in their hand-held devices. If you just sit back and observe people around you, wherever you are, you will notice how almost everyone is buried on their phones. Yes, including me. There’d be people beside you, family, friends and strangers waiting for something, in the middle of a conversation, having dinner, watching TV, and all focus is on the phone. I saw a brilliant cartoon the other day on Facebook where people around were portrayed as shadows and the people beside them portrayed brightly and vividly on their phone, oblivious to the real world situations and people around them thanks to that wondrous invention – the smart phone. One time, we were at the airport and witnessed a family of four – mom, dad, two young children about five or 7 years old and all four of them on their devices sitting and waiting in the lounge. “How sad” I thought to myself and was also so thankful I didn’t have to raise my two kids (now adults 21 and 19) with the distraction of the smart phone or iPad. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not ALL bad. There is a purpose and wonderful world within that smart phone no doubt, however, as with anything in life, moderation is key.

There is an increased link to mental health issues, social anxiety and an addiction to social media due to the introduction of the smart phone. That’s another post for another time.

I feel I am constantly reminding my family of the need to put down that phone. At dinner and meal times together, it is an absolute NO, and everyone adheres to it! Overall though, it’s a hard sell. The smart phone gives you that distraction, engagement, entertainment and mindless leisure all at your finger tips….so I am starting the change with me.

·       I give myself periods during the day where I use it and then have time to be completely unplugged.

·       The phone was my train ride buddy – but now, I use it only half way through and switch to a great read for the other half of the ride. I’ve been reading more lately which I quite enjoy. I am currently reading Michelle Obama’s “Becoming” – a great read!

·       The mindless game of Candy Crush has stopped while having a conversation on speaker phone or my headset.

·       It’s been a treat to engage with people and being present fully without having to twiddle my thumbs on the device.

·       When I am watching TV or a movie – I do just that or at least I try my best to. This is still, a work in progress. For the most part it’s, no more picking up the phone and idling through social media during the boring parts or commercials.

·       It’s an absolute NO while enjoying company and hanging out with friends and family.

The phone still is a valuable tool when you want to look things up further to what you are watching or discussing, so that’s not going to stop. It’s a joy though, to enjoy life and people with no distractions. To be fully present. To enjoy and experience the moment just as it is. It’s hard for those, like me, who are accustomed now to the ease of information and entertainment right at your finger tips. It’s a process to unlearn something you just picked up and oh so well too. It’s work-in-progress to me. Now, I will be picking it up to post and promote this blog post and catch up on others, but right after, I am putting that darn phone down.

Drown out the white noise!

Ever had that nagging noise in the back of your head like a humdrum of a fan in the background? It usually comes on when a brilliant idea pops up or you want to go after something you’ve always wanted. Your passion, your dreams or goals perhaps. It’s an annoying buzz of negativity, what ifs and I don’t think it’s doable running low, slow and steady in the back of your mind. Drown it out! Yes, yes, it’s hard. Easier said than done I know, but, keep at it and it becomes easier and easier every time you do. Keep building that muscle of pushing out the noise. Soon it will become a habit and an instinct that helps you keep moving ahead with your ideas, goals and plans. Learn how to quieten the white noise when you have things to accomplish. Here’s how;

·        Take a break – Seems counter-intuitive but it really DOES work. Go for a walk. Take in nature. Just sit and still your mind with a cup of tea or coffee. Read a book. Do something to change the scenery. Don’t think about what needs to be done, just enjoy the moment, stay calm and try to quiet the mind by not thinking about what needs to be done, your idea, goal or plan. Just enjoy the moment just as it is. It may take a few hours, it may take a couple of days but tale the time needed to give yourself and your mind a break. Then get back at it.

·        Plan it out – “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail” ~ Benjamin Franklin. Plan out your idea or goal. Jot down the high-level steps, your details in-between, create a task list. It’s a great way to drown out the noise. Keep working towards your goal by pouring your mind and planning towards it. You won’t hear much of the noise planning out your big dream. Remember a dream is just a dream until it’s planned out and followed through by action to make it a reality.

·        Give in to it – Yes – it’s completely opposite of bullet #1, but, that white noise may be something you need to pay close attention to. Write down ALL the what ifs, the negatives, the issues and challenges. Think about ways to mitigate them. Write it out. Every time they come out, work out a strategy to overcome them. If you can’t come up with a strategy to overcome them, then action bullet #1 😊 it’s amazing what you can accomplish by just giving yourself a quick break.

·        Get help – Have a close circle of friends, family and encouragers. Seek out the most supportive in the lot and talk it out. Having a friendly ear always helps dispel any doubts. They can also help discern the real issues versus just random worries. Beware of the negative Nellies. See more here http://tehanimott.blogspot.com/2013/05/dont-get-sucked-in.html They do have a purpose, but you are looking to move forward, so seek out the positive and encouraging allies you need during this time.  

Most often we don’t realize our purpose, dreams and goals, not because we can’t, but because we give into that white noise in the background. While there’s always value of listening in, there is more value in pushing through all that hum drum noise and realizing whatever it is you want to realize. So, shush that noise already and push through. Your passion project awaits.

Yep, I have a horn of plenty!

Cornucopia; commonly seen around Thanksgiving time, is a symbol of abundance, plenty, fruit, nourishment and colour. It was around the Canadian tables, mid-October, and will show off its’ autumn hues again on the American tables, end of November. Coming from an Asian country I knew nothing of its’ symbolism and existence until I settled in Canada. It is a great reminder of things to be thankful for, the one day of the year. If only it permanently stays the full 365 days of the year and 366 days every leap year!! Would it then help us remember the abundance in our lives? The things we take for granted daily? The little things we should be thankful for that others may not have the privilege to experience or have?

Alli Polin reminded me of this with her blog on “Ditch the Stress; Choose Gratitude” If you haven’t read it yet I highly recommend you do. I did, which inspired this post on being thankful and here is my list of things I am VERY thankful for;

1. My Husband, Son and Daughter…yes that’s three but they are all #1 on my list and the reason for ALL I do and am.
2. My Dad, Mom, Sister and Brother (I hate the word brother in law) in Texas, who know, that even though I don’t say it often, I love them with all my heart.
3. Wonderful, crazy, fun and awesome friends. They keep me young and happy.
4. My God. My faith!
5. I am thankful for the roof over my head. I see people on my daily commute who live under a bridge in Toronto. They are people just like you and me, but some circumstance in life got them there. Don’t judge!!
6. My country. Yes, even in winter I love it!
7. My job, which I don’t consider a job. It’s my opportunity to serve.
8. Good health.
9. My church community.
10. Social media and the amazing people I connect through it. They inspire me daily on my commute to work and back home. Also, without it, I wouldn’t be writing this post.
11. My online communities; #LeadWithGiants, #LeadFromWithin and #HRockstars. They keep me learning and motivated.
12. The honourable men and women that serve to protect us and our freedoms.
13. Shoes and handbags…. thank you sister for making me appreciate them!
14. Hockey games, specially my son’s! It keeps my vocal cords strong.
15. My daughter’s Cheerleading. It keeps us traveling often.
16. The Canadian Mental Health Association, Peel and the Board members I serve with. They have given me an opportunity to do something good.
17. Music…. all kinds of music.
18. Good food.
19. A seat on the GO train. It’s a precious thing in the morning.
20. The great times I have with my family.
21. Board games which happens to also contribute to #18.
22. Good movies. Gladiator is #1 on my list of faves.
23. Joe, the paper man near the subway, who always smiles and says good morning to everyone bustling by. I wish more people would smile back at the very least!
24. My life, just the way it is!
25. Swimming. It has taught me a TON. I now miss those grueling days dearly.
26. Family vacations.
27. Lilly at Tim Horton’s. She always serves me my coffee with a GIANT smile.
28. Tim Horton’s coffee. It’s certainly not the best but gives me comfort.
29. I am thankful for YOU, for reading this.
30. My family as a whole. They’ve shaped me and continue to do so everyday!

Thanks again for reading! I hope it has inspired you and was worth your time. Do jot down your list of things you are thankful for. I did! Thanks, Alli Polin for that inspiration!

Grudges are like little cancerous cells that eat at you slowly

Ever had a grudge with anyone? Please contact me if your answer is no. I would like to talk to you. We've all had a grudge with someone at some point or another. They may have said the wrong thing, rubbed you the wrong way or done something quite unforgivable. Your grudge may start with annoyance, to dislike, to a negative feeling that just doesn't go away. Like the little acorn that grows into an oak, this tiny little grudge grows into something quite large that can't be shaken off that easily. Before you know it, your little grudge has made shelter and turned its tiny spot into a full blown warehouse with underground parking and all.

The sad fact is that this grudge can eat away at you like a cancerous tumour. Your mood changes, you feel irksome, you are short tempered, you feel sick and are not yourself. It keeps chipping away at you until it gets the most of you.

I have learned to let my grudges go. I flick them away like a stray piece of bread crumb at a picnic table. Forgive and forget they say, and if you cannot forgive then move on! It doesn't deserve an ounce of your thought or time for that matter so don't give it that precedence. You just end up feeding the little tumour.

• Let grudges go. They don't deserve the attention they usually get!
• Do forgive and forget. Life is way too short to be annoyed at anyone or anything for too long. It does feel good to forgive and if you really can't do that then just move on. Don't give it a second thought. Not ever.
• Ask yourself if it's really that important. Most times it's not. So, get off of that petty chair and patch things up.
• Grudge rhymes with sludge. They also mean about the same thing, with the difference being one's internal (and it's not sludge!!)
• Be free! Live free! It's never fun carrying a lot of baggage.

Lessons learned from Fifi - always wear good shoes!

Fifi, aka my sister always wore good shoes. It was hilarious to see her strutting around the house when she was little with her long skinny legs and mom's heels. This was a normal occurrence, hence the name Fifi. It suited her to a tee. It's funny how that personality carried through to adult hood. No matter what the circumstance or occasion, you will always see her in a "much to be envied" pair of shoes.

Flip flops were my mode of footwear. I wore it to the pool, the mall and even to parties. I wore it with pride and didn't care what anyone had to say or think. As time went by and with much egging on by Fifi, I did see the benefits of her colourful stilettos. It livened any mood, made you feel great and you really did look like a million bucks wearing them. So instead of a wardrobe full of colourful rubber flip flops, I am now the proud owner of a variety of colourful wedges, espadrilles, pumps, peep toes, sling back, booties and boots. It's become a passion to shop for shoes. The bolder and brighter the better. I still have my trusted flip flops in black and brown. They do bring me joy when I wear them now and then. But to feel like I'm strutting the catwalk I need to pull out the "Fifi" shoes. Thanks, Fifi for not giving up on me and expanding my shoe vocabulary!

• Whether you are a guy or gal, wear good shoes. People do take notice.
• You don't get dirty looks walking into stores when you have great shoes on. You do if you don't.
• When you feel under the weather, put on a pair of fancy shoes. They liven you up instantly.
• A boring outfit can be brought to life with a pair of cool shoes.
• "A shoe has so much more to offer than just to walk" ~ Christian Louboutin. "One day I will own one of these Red Soles!" ~ Tehani Mott

Don't be a wallflower...not ever!

Here's what Wikipedia defines as a "wallflower"..."In social situations, a wallflower is a shy or unpopular individual who doesn't socialize or participate in activities at social events. He or she may have other talents but usually does not express them in the presence of other individuals"

Of course everyone has talents. Some genuinely have more than others and some may think they have talent in some area but who will let them know otherwise? In any event everyone has some sort of talent... be it singing, dancing, entertaining, cooking, leading people, motivating them, the list can go on. If you have not yet figured out what your talent is, then find it. You have something that you do better than anyone else, that is unique to you. Find it and share it as it serves no purpose keeping it hidden! That's why I say, "don't be a wallflower"!

There maybe times where being a wallflower may serve its purpose. Unless you are a secret service agent, the moments of appropriately being a wallflower are few and far between. They also should be brief whenever present. Personally, I think it's selfish to have a talent and not share it with the world. I don't mean the "world" literally but what I mean is those around you. Those that can benefit and enjoy the talent you have. Your community, school, work place, your friends and family. Don't be a wallflower! It's selfish in my books and not to be tolerated.

• Never be afraid to share your talents. Not only will it enrich you but it may also enrich someone else.
• Participate. Just being present and taking up space is not good enough. There's plenty of "space takers" in a growing world, don't be one of them or one of those things! Even big space takers like rocks offer up a purpose. They can be collected, admired or climbed.
• Know what you are good at. If you don't know, try finding it. The journey you take to find it will improve yourself and grace others. Even singing off key starts laughter in the room.
• Unless you are in a library or at the theatre being a quiet participant is not an option. You don't have to be loud, but you do have to be involved. See bullet #2 again.
• Step out. Enjoy life. Participate. Share your ideas and talents with others. You are here in this world for a reason. Fulfill it, or at least try to!