COVID Diaries

By the time the second week of March rolled around, everyone at work was a buzz preparing for an additional work-from home day from the usual one day a week. Schedules were prepared to coordinate subject matter expertise and coverage to ensure when someone was home, someone else who knew the portfolio was at work. It was a Friday afternoon and the schedule of who’s in and who’s working from home was laid out. I was anxiously awaiting the news of Hamilton – the play I waited for what seemed like years to enjoy, seeing if it was a go or no go. The NBA and the NHL had both suspended all future games with no eminent date of return. All large gatherings cancelled but no news of the Hamilton status yet. I was hoping they would still go ahead with it. Not wanting to wait any longer and have some sort of control I called Mirvish Productions. It was a feat to get through but eventually I did. Most theatre goers that had tickets for that Friday had cancelled or rescheduled the date in fear that it would be cancelled anyway. “It wouldn’t be the same play even if it were on” said the gentleman online. I opted to reschedule as a result and picked a date I thought far enough into the future that this COVID crisis would be a demise. Ha! If only I knew I would have just stuck to the date, hand sanitized like crazy, not touched my face and just witnessed one of the greatest musicals ever.

A week prior to this pandemonium, my husband and I had taken a short vacation to Vegas and boy was that a lot of fun! The airports we took off and landed in were as busy as ever. There were no extra “temperature” check points, everything seemed to be quite the same old, same old, except for a few folks wiping down the airplane seats, tray tables and seat belts with sanitary wipes. We were among these overly cautious. Can’t hurt to be to careful I thought shopping for the extra wipes and hand sanitizers. When we got to Vegas it was a party.

Back to March 13, also known as the Friday before shut-down. We packed up for the day to head home after receiving word that we would all be working from home for the next couple of weeks. It was strange, ominous and how things would progressively change from then to now, no one had a clue. The first work from home week was chaotic, with everyone wanting a teleconference meeting, update, summary and check in on this, that and everything. Quietly though, things settled down when decks were completed on time, summaries submitted, reports handed in and the usual outcomes kept coming in steadily. There was flow. There were results. No one was outside sipping margaritas and goofing off. You must trust your employees to deliver, if not, why have you hired them in the first place. It begins with trust!

COVID has been extremely challenging for some. I recognize that I was among the fortunate few that didn't have to worry about the very basic of necessities like food, clothing and shelter. I didn't have little kids around where I had to work, parent, run a house, teach them and entertain them all during a crisis. I didn't have an elderly family member in long term care that I needed to see or needed my attention. I was well. My family was well. For that I am very grateful. I have learned a ton through this crisis that I'd like to share with you. 

Here goes and I encourage you to jot down your own list of COVID lessons to share;

1. Resilience resides in all of us.
2. Change happens overnight and you can sink or swim with the change. You decide.
3. Good leadership during a crisis is an absolute must.
4. Most “office” jobs can be done from anywhere, any couch, any patio and most times can be done better from home.
5. We don’t need much – not even toilet paper!
6. If you have a roof over your head, food in your fridge and pantry then you do have plenty compared to some.
7. There is joy. There is joy. There is joy. You must open your eyes to see it.
8. In a crisis people will either rise to the occasion or cower in fear. I hope you RISE!
9. Human connection is critical and if it can’t be done face to face then a quick hello, text or call is powerful.
10. Nature MUST be respected. It really did need this time to breathe.
11. Support your local businesses, the small entrepreneur, the mom and pop shop often.
12. Most people are reasonable – except for the ones who stock up on toilet paper.
13. Treasure the simplest things in life – a coffee in the morning sunshine, the chirping of the birds a hug from your daughter after 2 months of isolation.
14. You are NEVER alone. Really.
15. Mental health is part of health and it matters a whole lot.
16. A morning routine brings so much productivity and personal benefits.
17. Everyone should try yoga and meditation. Even 5 min everyday will make a world of difference.
18. We are creative creatures.
19. Live every moment to the fullest.
20. Don’t take the everyday humdrum for granted.
21. Everyone has untapped talent and sometimes needs the time and opportunity to bloom.
22. Do the things you want to do. Stop waiting for the perfect time. There is no such thing.
23. Anytime you can, any way you can, help someone out. This could be EVERYTHING to them.
24. Preparation is key.
25. A long drive can be a great way to decompress.
26. Breathe. It’s a beautiful reminder of how awesome it is to be alive.
27. Spread kindness like sprinkles. You get much more out of it than you give out.
28. Always have a plan B.
29. Cultivating a minimalistic lifestyle will never goes out of style.
30. Hold on to the things that serve you well and let everything else go!

Surrounding areas are slowly moving on to stage 2 now. You can sit on a patio and enjoy some dinner and drinks. We did that last week in Waterloo and what a treat that was. How we take the simplest of things for granted. I will keep looking at this list and update it from time to time. To all the front-line workers in hospitals, at grocery stores, at the pharmacies and the MacDonald’s drive-throughs, a BIG THANK YOU for keeping us all going. There are lots of positives out of this crisis. It’s important for us to recognize that, capture it and hold on to it. We keep learning. And remember always, wash your hands and don’t touch your face. 

One thing off of the Bucket List

I finally signed up for Yoga Teacher Training. After five and something years of wanting to do it, I finally did! I wrote up the application, toured the studio, paid my registration fees and took my 1^st class in a nine-month training course, this past weekend. It was that simple. I had a million and one excuses before…. it was never the right time, there was always too much going on, kids were involved in this that and the other, then it was the kids’ university which is costly, there were the vacations that got in the way, the studios the classes were conducted at seemed hard to get to. Again, excuses and none of them substantial. If I really wanted to do it, I could have but just didn’t get around to doing it. Plain and simple. The “will” was not stronger than all those excuses combined. Finally, though, it was. I signed up, because this time, I REALLY wanted to do it. My intent and will were strong enough to finally commit to getting it done.

The 1^st weekend of the training course is now under my belt. I have nine more weekends and eight more Thursday nights to complete. The 1^st weekend was both exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. My classmates are wonderful, and our teachers are fabulous. The energy around the room, exhausted as we all were, was still very uplifting. Everyone had their own story and reasons for embarking on this journey and they were just as diverse as the group of us. It’s a lot to complete. It’s not going to be easy.  We must all fit in assignment time, regular yoga practice time, study time and training time along with work, family and just regular day to day stuff. Personal goals are never easy to achieve but the harder you work at it and achieve it, the sweeter the reward. Once completed, there will be one less item on my bucket list. I can’t wait.

How many times do we postpone things we really want to do? I am not talking about a loose wish list but something that has substance and real desire to complete like a long-standing bucket list item or a goal in life. This was one of them for me. A million of excuses and challenges certainly will come up. It’s up to us to move past them all. There is no such thing as the right time…. there will always be a bill that needs to be paid, there will always be regular day to day commitments, fitting it in to our already packed days and weeks and months will always be an issue but, nothing that cannot be addressed and overcome. There are ways. Lots of ways to “just do it” (thanks Nike). So, what’s stopping you? Start your list and figure out ways to overcome all those dreaded excuses.

I will leave you with this “Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Namaste!

Life is precious – don’t take it for granted!

It was 9/11 about a week ago and I am reminded how fragile and precious life is.  All those who lost their lives that day, headed out that morning to work, boarded a plane, went out for a walk or started their daily routine not knowing that it was their last. Their lives and the lives of their loved ones altered forever in just a fraction of a moment. Just like that.

I remember when the son of a very good friend of ours died in a boating accident. He was 13! I recall hearing the news stunned in disbelief. He was my son’s hockey team mate. He was out on their family boat on a long weekend in the summer when tragedy struck. I still remember the faces of the family members at the funeral and my son, along with five other team mates walking beside the casket. It hit home. Life is precious. Not a single moment should ever be taken for granted.

That experience taught me a lot.

·        Don’t save things for special occasions

·        If you have something nice to say to someone, say it. Don’t hold back

·        Pursue your dreams – write them down, set goals and keep chipping away at them

·        Every morning is a gift – treat it as such

·        Your family is the most important thing in this world. Never ever take them for granted

·        Appreciate the simple treasures in life

·        Don’t put off things you can accomplish today

·        Cultivate a grateful mindset

·        Never sweat the small stuff – “Let it go” ~ Frozen

·        Appreciate all the beauty around you

·        Live in the moment. Appreciate it. Treasure it. Soak it in

·        LIVE

·        Life is short – buy the shoes, take the trip, eat the cake

·        Know that you CAN make a difference, even in the smallest of ways you can

·        There is no such thing as a perfect time

I could keep going on. We get so caught up with life and the littlest of things at times that we forget to treasure the moment, enjoy the present and really and truly be grateful for the gift we have called life. So, live it. Treasure it. Take it in. Be ever so grateful for the gift of it.    

Own it and turn it into brilliance

Have you ever seen the TV series Ballers? It’s about a “fixer”/ “man Friday” to pro-football players and a series we are hooked on watching right now. Anyway, in one of the episodes the lead character Spencer, tries to patch things up with an old rival player, Balsamo, by having him throw out the first pitch at a baseball game. It’s a huge moment for the retired footballer, Balsamo. As he comes out, the crowd cheers him on and chants his name. It’s a flashback to his glory days. He takes to the pitcher’s mound and swings it hard towards home plate. He completely misses and slams the ball straight into the stomach of the boom-mic guy on the side. The crowd starts booing and someone yells “Balsamo, you suck”. Balsamo utterly butchered his spotlight moment and he stands frozen looking around at the crowd. Instead of cowering back to the stands, he owns the blunder, throws his arms up triumphantly and confidently, egging the crowd to cheer him on. Suddenly, the fans change, and they are back to applauding him and cheering him on. It’s an amazing moment. I remember watching it thinking it’s a wonderful lesson in turning things around. Not everything will go as well as we planned so why not own it and make it a brilliant lesson.

Sure, some lessons will be humbling, very humbling and we should not or may not have the opportunity to celebrate it, like catastrophes (I won’t go into detailed examples, but you can imagine what they are). These may not be the moments we throw our arms up in the air and ask for more applause, but there are lessons we can learn. We just take them in quietly, reflecting on them with care and grace.

For the most part though mistakes are just that, mistakes. We seem to give them too much negative energy, rather than spinning them into something good and something valuable to learn from. Here’s my two cents….

·        Own it – You made the mistake, take ownership. Accept, apologize and move on.

·        Fix it – It’s yours to fix, so fix it. Figure out a way to make amends, make it better and turn it around so there’s some good that comes out of it.

·        Learn from it – Mistakes have a way of repeating themselves if you don’t learn from them the first time. Funnily enough, that’s how life works. So, learn from it, preferable the first time and not the second- or third-time round.  

·        Pay it forward – If someone’s made the same mistake, help them and support them through it. 

·        Reflect – How do you do better? How can you avoid this again? What went wrong? Reflection is key for self-growth. Careful that you don’t go down the “woah is me” path. Stay above the fray. Stay classy.

·        Turn it into brilliance – Mistakes are sometimes opportunities in the making. Penicillin and the chocolate chip cookie were discovered because Sir Alexander Fleming and Ruth Wakefield made mistakes. You may not be inventing the next Penicillin but who knows, there maybe a golden opportunity you maybe missing. Look closely. 

I just finished reading the book, #Girlboss, the rags to riches story of Sophia Amoruso who founded “Nasty Gal”, the fastest growing retailer in 2012 according to Inc Magazine. There’s a line in the book that I love…. I quote; “My advice to #GIRLBOSSes is to get excited about the mistakes you’ll make”. So, here’s to the fictional Balsamo’s and the non-fictional Sophia Amoruso’s who embraced their mistakes and turned them into brilliance. It’s time we do the same!  

You promote what you tolerate

Let that sink in. You promote what you tolerate. Let that sink in again.

I saw that on someone’s t-shirt and that mantra has stuck with me ever since. I am very careful as to what I tolerate.

What are you tolerating?

·       Lack of respect?

·       A toxic environment?

·       Bad behavior?

·       Negativity?

I could keep going on. There are some things I have absolutely no patience for. The above list is an example. I absolutely will NOT tolerate any form of it. Not even a teeny little bit of it. When I recognize it, I walk away and walk away quickly. No further reason needed.

If you cannot change it, then you need to change yourself. That could mean walking away from people or places that do not suit you or go against your core values. Never put up with bad behavior or a toxic culture. Learn to walk away as soon as you can before that becomes your norm or you promote that behavior inadvertently. Remember “you promote what you tolerate”. I have walked away from situations, people and places that do not suit my lifestyle or value system.

So, what happens when you don’t have the luxury of not being able to change the situation and you cannot just walk away?

·       You let your voice heard – Speak up of what you are willing to accept and what you will NOT put up with. Be clear with your expectations. Be clear with why you will not accept it. Be reasonable. Make sure you are not the unreasonable one or the one causing all the stir. 

·       Start planning - You plan your next move. Carefully. You assess what you will do next. You can’t change the past, but you can certainly make calculated moves towards the direction you need to go to next.

·       Get help – I’ve been in conflict situations where I could not change the very unreasonable person I was dealing with. I did try, but I couldn’t change them, not one little bit. So, I got help to change my attitude towards the person and the circumstance. I did eventually plan out my next move. It was too much of a toxic person/environment to ignore and put up with.

Never put up with people or situations that are negative towards your health (including mental health), be guarded with your inner circle and be WELL aware of what you tolerate. You promote what you tolerate.

Savor the little things

It’s summer time. I want to make the most of it. So, when hubby says, “ice cream?” at 11pm, I say “absolutely”. We get to the ice cream store and the lineup is all the way up to the main road. It’s like everyone thought of ice cream at 11pm at night. There are families, young kids, older couples, the place is buzzing. Everyone just out trying to soak up every bit of summer. A small enjoyment like a cone of ice cream was what everyone wanted. Too often we get caught up with the “big” things that we completely miss the little joys in life. These little joys most times become the big things in life. So, savor the moment and soak up every ounce of joy and happiness from all those little moments. Here are some of mine starting with of course;

·       Ice Cream at 11pm on a hot summer night

·       Snap chat conversations with your kids – they are funny and entertaining

·       Coffee early morning on the deck and seeing the busyness of the birds

·       Game nights with the family – it gets heated!

·       The commute in the morning and passing through the Credit River – it’s an even bigger treat seeing the Oarsmen rowing on the water

·       Those Pjs and Pancake days

·       A glass of wine with the hubby in the backyard and the loud drone of Cicadas

·       An impromptu visit from a friend

·       Sunday night dinner with all the family present – a rare treat now when your kids become young adults

·       Long drives - anywhere

·       A dip in the lake on a hot summer day

·       Table topic conversations with the family – you learn so much

·       Antique shopping – I try my best not to get carried away

·       Hot tub time, especially in the Winter

·       Any vacation – big or small. Some of the best ones we’ve had were weekend gateways at Niagara-on-the-Lake

·       Ball games in the summer

·       BBQs and get-togethers with family and friends

·       Happy hours and patios

·       Easy conversations with the kids

The littlest things take up the biggest part of our lives. So, treasure them. Never ever take them for granted. Take them all in…. slowly, appreciating the little treasures in life.  

Practice pause

Sunday morning is my yoga day. I try not to miss it, even if we have lots going on. It’s the one time in the week I practice my pause. A pause from thinking, doing, rushing, cramming everything I can do and more, and just pause. It’s a reflection of the week and a great start to the week ahead. It’s just me and my mat.  Taking everything in and letting everything go. Inhaling. Exhaling. Practicing pause.

Why don’t we just incorporate that every day? The practice of pause.

We live in a society where doing just one thing at a time is just not good enough. It’s a multi-tasking, multi-everything kind of society. We seem to be biting off more than we can chew and call it an accomplishment. Have we done it well? What did we sacrifice whizzing through it? What toes did we step on? How was our health? How did it affect our family and friends? Was it worth it in the end? Not sure if we have the answers. We may not even have time to reflect.

I know when I take to my mat every Sunday morning, I slow down. I reflect. I appreciate the moment of just being there. Taking a breath. Appreciating it. Taking a breath. Being grateful for all I have. Practicing a pause. Enjoying it. Being present in the moment. Why don’t we do it more often? Throughout the day, throughout the year, throughout our lives. Practice pause. Reflect.

1.       When it’s overwhelming – pause

2.       Not sure where to go or what to do next – pause

3.       Inundated with news of the day – pause

4.       Finished a task and before diving into the next – pause

5.       Career changes – pause

6.       In the morning before you start your day – pause

7.       In the hustle and bustle of the day – pause

8.       Anytime you feel you need it – pause

9.       Before we speak – pause

10.   At the end of the day – pause

11.   Tackling a wicked problem – pause

12.   On your vacation – pause

13.   Before saying yes – pause

14.   Before saying no – pause

15.   With your loved ones – pause. A big pause.

I’ve named only 15 but there’s so many more occasions and reasons we can pause, take things in, reflect and carve out a little break. Here’s to practicing it more…. pause. Namaste.